A vaishnav asks us -"Sewa is done regularly in our family from two-three generations.Even I do it since I was a little child, that is from about 40 years.My wife and children also support me in doing sewa.I do not have any sort of worries in life.But alongwith all these there is a constant thought that I haven't achieved anything of real substance in life.Materially I am very happy.But my sewa has merely become a daily routine, when I skip it I feel unsatisfied, that's all ! I do sewa regularly for about an hour and half daily but after which I cannot do smaran of Shriji, even if I try to do it I cannot concentrate !!Why does this happen ?Even after so many years of sewa why does this happen ?"
Love is a feeling that does not require any special effort, it happens effortlessly.Yes, to protect this feeling you need to do some effort.We must make an effort to see that this feeling is not resticted to the one-two hours that we do sewa but extends beyond it too.We have set a frame of thought that those who are not pushtimargiya vaishnavas or those who do not do sewa are Bahirmukhas (those who are not infront of Shriji) and those who do sewa can never be Bahirmukha, but this is only a wrong notion.Even after many years of sewa if one has a felling that "I haven't achieved anything of real substance !" then that man is also a Bahirmukha because he does not realise that sewa in itself is the real substance, what more can we hope to get in this form? We might be able to concentrate while we are in sewa but we must be able to carry these thoughts even after our sewa is over, during anavsar (the time when we are not in the sewa of Shriji).There are four things which make a vaishnava a Bahirmukha :
Anyashray.(worshipping or believing in beliefs which are opposed to Pushtimarg)
Asamarpit.(Consuming things which are not dedicated to Shriji)
Asatsang.(Company of those who polute our mind)
If even one of these four is present in our lives then we shall become Bahirmukhas and we shall continuously go away from our real goal in life.We do not get mukti by merely getting the diksha in Pushtimarg (brahmasambandh).We have to do our duty - of performing sewa - whilst living in this world itself, this is the real test of our lives i.e. what is more important to us - our prabhu (lord Krishna) or our wordly possessions!!!When our material and spiritual worlds become one or prabhu becomes most important to us then sewa of one second shall be enough to please prabhu,we shall not get the chance o saying -"Even after 40 years of sewa I haven't achieved anything of real substance in life!".
Love requires sacrifice.People sacrifice their home and family for getting the love of some person.We must constantly think about the wordly sacrifices we have made for our prabhu.If we think that we can get the love from prabhu while continuing our material life then it's impossible.Shri Vallabh has taught in the shodash granthas that we must never consider our prabhu to be wordly, if we are lost in this world then he shall never come to our heart.Only when our world shall be attached to prabhu and we shall start believing that "I am a servant of prabhu","All that I have belongs to prabhu" then alone will prabhu come to us, not earlier.
In Pushtimarg Shriji (Lord Krishna) accepts each and everything by the prayer of shri Vallabh and Shri Vitthal (Shri Gusainji) only(we are mere followers of the path shown by them), so if we believe that "I do sewa with a lot of love" then we are bolstering our ego only,not our bhav.
We must always keep all these things in mind and remember the last message of Shri Vallabh which translates as such -"Only if you leave the feet of prabhu can the Kalilkal affect you !!"